Over the past year I have been afforded a unique chance to be able to express myself through my writing. Not many people get to live in a world that they create or relive stories from their childhood. I wasn’t always this forthcoming with my experiences and very reserved with regards to my life but as I have learned over the years, I will be heard.
One of my favorite “chick flicks” is ” The Joy Luck Club”. This movie follows the lives of of four Chinese immigrant families in California. The lives of the mothers are retold through the eyes and experiences of the daughters. One of my most relatable stories is that of, ironically, Rose and her mother, An-Mei. An-Mei, was a child in China when she lost her father and her mother brought disgrace to the family by her becoming a concubine for a man who already had three wives. She was forced to marry him after he raped her and she became pregnant and had no where to go. She decided that she would bring An-Mei to live with her to provide her with a better life. But when An-Mei heard all that had transpired with her mother, she was shocked and disappointed. As retold by An-Mei, her mother committed suicide because she had a weak spirit and wanted to give her daughter a strong one. On the day of her funeral, An-Mei stood up and took her brother, who by now was being raised by her stepfather and the second wife, and told all of them that her mother’s spirit would come back and repay all debts. Everyone finally stood up and listened to her. An-Mei went on to raise her daughter, Rose to have that strong spirit and to know her full worth. But once she married her husband, she became a background player and was not present. Her husband had an affair, and they were in the process of getting a divorce, when An-Mei asked her one question. What are you worth? She proceeded to tell Rose about her mother and her lack of self-esteem and hoped that would instill that sense of awakening and it did.
I relate to this story so much because I too have spent many years as a background player. Playing second fiddle to people that I have been friends with, relationships that I have had, even jobs that I have done. Out of all years to feel inspired, this year for me is a very positive one. I was born the year of the Dragon in Chinese astrology and 2012 is the Year of the Dragon. Just like An-Mei knew her self worth and Rose discovered hers again, I too have had my epiphany and I want you to have yours too!
First off, just know your worth. Not in one aspect but in all aspects. Know your self worth. do you value yourself? Do you treat yourself with respect so that others treat you the same? Take a “me” day and make yourself not only feel good but look good too. Know your money worth? Do you have money that you earn and enough of it for a rainy day? Do you know what’s on your credit report? Don’t wait until a bank or someone else lets you know what is on it. Take charge! Pull your own report and make moves to fix it or to deal with what is on it. Lastly, do you know your work worth? Do your bosses value you and the work that you do? Are you paid what you are worth? Some of us work and work and have nothing to show for it but gray hair. Be a dragon. Gain inner peace, and show others the fire, grace and beauty that demands to be respected.